FAQs: These answers are designed to help you understand whether Family Constellations work might be a good fit for you, and what to expect if you choose to take part in a session or workshop
If you’re unsure, you can attend an introductory session or get in touch before booking.
Do I have to have an issue?
No, you do not have to attend with a burning issue. People participate in a workshop to witness the work and often this can be enough to help resolve issues in your own life without doing a full constellation of your own. Or you may find things are bubbling away before a workshop so much that you are desperate for a resolution. This can often be the best place to start.
What is representing? How will I know I can represent?
Anyone who participates in a constellation workshop may be called upon to "represent" in a constellation. Representing simply means to stand in the place in which you are put in the room and report back on any felt sense. Although people can worry they will not know how to represent, actually everybody who has ever participated has been able to "represent" accurately. You are of course at liberty not to represent if you prefer.
What about confidentiality?
Confidentiality is a given in a constellation group. Whilst we may wish to go away and report on what we have witnessed and the impact it has on ourselves, group particpants are expected always to respect the confidentiality of participants and not speak about their experiences in any way which may identify somebody or their issues.
Q: I’ve tried therapy or CBT and it didn’t change the patterns I’m stuck in — how is this different?
A:
Family Constellations works systemically, which means we are not only looking at thoughts or behaviours, but at the wider relational and generational patterns that may be influencing them. Many people find that when they see their situation in a broader context, something shifts that hasn’t shifted through more cognitive or insight-based approaches alone.
If this feels familiar, and you are wondering where to begin, you can explore the different routes here, or just browse my site to explore more.
Q: Is this about blaming parents or family members?
A: No. In fact, the work often moves people beyond blame. Blame tends to keep us psychologically bound to the past. A systemic perspective looks instead at patterns and loyalties that may have formed across generations, which can create a different kind of understanding and often a sense of relief. Many people come to this work precisely because they want to move beyond blame and into a wider understanding of what is happening in their life, I've written more about this here:
Do I need to bring information with me?
If you can find out about your family history in advance this can be very helpful. Particularly find out if anyone has been excluded from the famlly for any reason, and of if your family has been impacted by big historic events such as war or immigration.
How many people will be in the group
Usually between 8 and 14.
Can I bring someone I know?
Yes. It can be really valuable to bring friends who will remember different parts of the constellation than you. I recommend bringing friends that you deeply trust.
Can I bring family members?
Please contact me to discuss. Sometimes one of you may need to leave the room during the other's constellation.
What if I cannot stand for long periods?
Most venues have disabled access, but please check with me in advance. If you cannot stand for a long period, you can sit.
I am concerned that there might be people I know present:
Please contact me if this is a concern for you, as there are ways this can be managed.
What are the outcomes I can expect?
Participants report insights into family dynamics or the dynamics of a situation they are constellating.
They often see the root cause of a situation.
They also often feel deeply touched and seen, which can be for many a very new experience
A shift in perspective which allows for transformation to take place
People often report that they leave feeling unburdened
Often the initial experience leaves people feeling "stirred up" but later more centred, more grounded, more understanding of their own emotions.
Aftercare:
Usually clients are encouraged not to analyse their constellation and instead stay with their feelings, which will evolve over the ensuing weeks.
If after some time you would like a one to one follow up session, this can be arranged
These answers are based on systemic Family Constellations work and the patterns I see from my 16 year practice with individuals and groups
If you’re unsure, you can attend an introductory session or get in touch before booking.
Do I have to have an issue?
No, you do not have to attend with a burning issue. People participate in a workshop to witness the work and often this can be enough to help resolve issues in your own life without doing a full constellation of your own. Or you may find things are bubbling away before a workshop so much that you are desperate for a resolution. This can often be the best place to start.
What is representing? How will I know I can represent?
Anyone who participates in a constellation workshop may be called upon to "represent" in a constellation. Representing simply means to stand in the place in which you are put in the room and report back on any felt sense. Although people can worry they will not know how to represent, actually everybody who has ever participated has been able to "represent" accurately. You are of course at liberty not to represent if you prefer.
What about confidentiality?
Confidentiality is a given in a constellation group. Whilst we may wish to go away and report on what we have witnessed and the impact it has on ourselves, group particpants are expected always to respect the confidentiality of participants and not speak about their experiences in any way which may identify somebody or their issues.
Q: I’ve tried therapy or CBT and it didn’t change the patterns I’m stuck in — how is this different?
A:
Family Constellations works systemically, which means we are not only looking at thoughts or behaviours, but at the wider relational and generational patterns that may be influencing them. Many people find that when they see their situation in a broader context, something shifts that hasn’t shifted through more cognitive or insight-based approaches alone.
If this feels familiar, and you are wondering where to begin, you can explore the different routes here, or just browse my site to explore more.
Q: Is this about blaming parents or family members?
A: No. In fact, the work often moves people beyond blame. Blame tends to keep us psychologically bound to the past. A systemic perspective looks instead at patterns and loyalties that may have formed across generations, which can create a different kind of understanding and often a sense of relief. Many people come to this work precisely because they want to move beyond blame and into a wider understanding of what is happening in their life, I've written more about this here:
Do I need to bring information with me?
If you can find out about your family history in advance this can be very helpful. Particularly find out if anyone has been excluded from the famlly for any reason, and of if your family has been impacted by big historic events such as war or immigration.
How many people will be in the group
Usually between 8 and 14.
Can I bring someone I know?
Yes. It can be really valuable to bring friends who will remember different parts of the constellation than you. I recommend bringing friends that you deeply trust.
Can I bring family members?
Please contact me to discuss. Sometimes one of you may need to leave the room during the other's constellation.
What if I cannot stand for long periods?
Most venues have disabled access, but please check with me in advance. If you cannot stand for a long period, you can sit.
I am concerned that there might be people I know present:
Please contact me if this is a concern for you, as there are ways this can be managed.
What are the outcomes I can expect?
Participants report insights into family dynamics or the dynamics of a situation they are constellating.
They often see the root cause of a situation.
They also often feel deeply touched and seen, which can be for many a very new experience
A shift in perspective which allows for transformation to take place
People often report that they leave feeling unburdened
Often the initial experience leaves people feeling "stirred up" but later more centred, more grounded, more understanding of their own emotions.
Aftercare:
Usually clients are encouraged not to analyse their constellation and instead stay with their feelings, which will evolve over the ensuing weeks.
If after some time you would like a one to one follow up session, this can be arranged
These answers are based on systemic Family Constellations work and the patterns I see from my 16 year practice with individuals and groups